Pain

As days go by my hunger grows stronger. As days go by I`m loosing my focus more and more due to the extraordinary need, desire or... will that covers my consciousness. I have done something stupid that broke my chain of evolution: I have spoken of the hunt, and now my lips are permanently dry, my thirst grows, I have stopped feeling and started wanting. My eyes came back to the hawk condition, because everywhere I look I see preys. I know, actually I am very sure I am not ready to hunt. My abilities are not back yet, my certainty is still far lost into the darkness of logic. I dream pure blood going along with lifeless eyes. I can`t focus, I have to focus to restrain myself. I have to stop or innocence will suffer again, and again... and again, till there is no innocence left in this world. I am a killer, I am born a killer, I am designed to kill. I feel no purpose in this nice, peaceful life. I am a killer. I will never try to change myself into a lamb. I have never been a lamb and lying myself has been my greatest mistake. Now what remains to be seen is if my need of belonging is stronger than my thirst.